First off, I read The Hobbit novel over a decade ago and remember barely anything except that the dwarves traveled far and didn't even get to kill the Dragon.
There were a ton of points in this movie where my brain screamed "Bilbo is fucked." Specifically the giant gold statue, but apparently he wasn't standing in the way whatever. Movie.
Bilbo's kill count is around 7 or 8 for this movie. Pretty good for one session.
I have a theory they brought Legolas into the story just so they could reuse their badass animation of him riding things down slopes. Most of the time those things were orcs.
Apparently there is such a thing as being too big and badass because Smaug can't even kill a handful of little guys. Sidenote: If Smaug was a D&D enemy he'd have like 35 hit dice and be practically a god. Hold on while I copy/paste that into my notes.
Back to Legolas, he's definitely name level, he's gotta be for all his bad ass jumping on heads and sliding on bodies and using a ranged weapon at point blank range. Get to level 9 and you can do this too.
Gandalf needs new spells. Or does deciding at precisely the right moment to bail count as a special ability?
Serious Question: Was Beorn played by Javier Bardem?
What sort of half-race would happen if The Sexy Dwarf and Tauriel (or "Kate from Lost" as my friends call her) made babies? I'd like to see that. For science.
How much XP is the Arkenstone worth? Like 30,000? 50,000? Does he have to split that with the party?
I guess that's all I have to say, honestly I got distracted and went to make a sandwich. It was delicious.
Both Leoendrithas Droverson and Ranger Ranger are definitely based on Legolas. I'm always trying to use my bow at point blank range and just roaming the countryside, looking for my Tauriel. And while we're on the subject of actresses from Lost, I think Emilie DeRavin (aka Claire from Lost) could've been an elf archer. She's apropriately aryan looking (blonde & blue) and has an Australian accent that could very easily be appropriated for the apparently British accent that everyone in the Tolkein/Jackson movies speaks in.
ReplyDeletePS. Please don't incorporate Smaug or any Smaug-like dragons into our game because you remember what happened the last time everyone got killed off at the same time. Although, Smaug proved to be very ineffective at killing people, at least in this installment, so maybe it wouldn't be so bad. We can just hide behind pillars for a while until he flies away.
I don't know who this Claire is, but I'll take your word for it.
ReplyDeleteAnd why not introduce Smaug? You don't want to have another season finale with a change of faces at the table like we're the cast of American Horror Story? Ancient Dragons like Smaug don't give a shit about low level characters though. Unless of course you're trying to steal from him.